I’m learning a lot about shame…

…from this MondoBeyondo Dream Lab course with special guest, Brene Brown, Author of “The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are – Your Guide to a Wholehearted Life”. She’s a Shame Researcher…

A story now, about my own shame:

I got very hurried this morning trying to make it out the door to the gym with my 9 mo old baby in tow (it was only the 3rd time in 9 months that i’ve tried to get to the gym and I was frazzled and unorganized)

…and, I yelled at him – for touching my hat….

– the look on his face, his curled bottom lip, my shame at my own impatience, my lack of self discipline.  I didn’t want him to mess up my hair by pulling my hat off, because, you know, it would make me look MORE like the fat, frumpy housewife that I feel like.  I was ashamed of me.  His touching my hat might have made me more ashamed, so I lashed out in anger.  I instantly regressed into previously felt emotions where I felt “not good enough”, and certainly not perfect.

What was perfect, was the opportunity to step back, and see where my trigger is…so much “instant anger” that i feel could be shame.  I can see I need to explore this further.

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One Comment on “I’m learning a lot about shame…”

  1. ~Monica says:

    Your little one is so lucky to have a mama who is so incredibly aware and open to change. You know that saying, ‘you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge’? Well look, you’re already there. I’m proud of you, from one Mom to another.

    And this realization you have unearthed? I have had many like these also. And I would rather be the Mom who is aware and eager to better herself than the one who is so closed off that she will never ever become a better person. Our little ones have much to teach us about ourselves and it is such a gift when we are able to see that.

    Big Hugs to you : )

    ~Monica

    Like


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